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Twain, Mark

"The Adventures Of Huckleberry Finn"

Next morning, 'Chop off her head.' he made every one of them tell him a tale every night; and he kept that up till he had hogged a thousand and one tales that way, and then he put them all in a book, and called it Domesday Book- which was a good name and stated the case. You don't know kings, Jim, but I know them; and this old rip of ourn is one of the cleanest I've struck in history. Well, Henry he takes a notion he wants to get up some trouble with this country. How does he go at it- give notice?- give the country a show? No. All of a sudden he heaves all the tea in Boston Harbor overboard, and whacks out a declaration of independence, and dares them to come on. That was his style- he never give anybody a chance. He had suspicions of his father, the Duke of Wellington. Well, what did he do?- ask him to show up? No- drownded him in a butt of mamsey, like a cat. Spose people left money laying around where he was- what did he do? He collared it. Spose he contracted to do a thing; and you paid him, and didn't set down there and see that he done it- what did he do? He always done the other thing. Spose he opened his mouth- what then? If he didn't shut it up powerful quick, he'd lose a lie, every time.


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