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Peck, George W., 1840-1916

"Peck's Compendium of Fun"

It made him swim all over, and under, and
everywhere. But if he sat down soon, he got up sooner. If there is one
thing that a house cat should be taught, it is to sleep elsewhere than on
the top stair. When he fell and struck the sleeping cat there was a
crisis. He took in the situation at once. An occasional disengaged feline
toe nail, and a squall, told him in burning words that, while his title to
the seat was contested, it would be impolitic to wait for a commission of
unbiased judges to decide which was entitled to it. His opponent was
armed, and had possession, and he felt that it would tend to prevent riot
and bloodshed if he quietly gave up. But he felt that while in his present
position the cat was comparatively harmless, if he attempted to rise she
would bring the whole army and navy into action, and perhaps cripple his
resources. So he decided to jump up in a hurry before the cat had time to
think of her toe nails much. His position was not pleasant, to say the
least, but he jumped up in a hurry, hoping the cat would remain and
continue her nap. She was not a remaining cat and as soon as his weight
was removed from her person, she gave a yell as though frightened, and
began to walk up and down his legs, inside of his night shirt.
The question as to how many toe nails a cat has got, has never been
decided, but he says they have a million, and he can show the documents to
prove it.


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