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Peck, George W., 1840-1916

"Peck's Compendium of Fun"

We knew how baked beans ought to be cooked from years of
experience, but supposed the Boston bean must hold over every other bean,
so when the can was opened and we found that every bean was separate from
every other bean, and seemed to be out on its own recognizance, and that
they were as hard as a flint, we gave them to the children to play marbles
with, and soured on Boston baked beans. Probably it was canning Boston
beans that broke up the canning establishment.

REGISTRY OF ELECTORS.
The registry law has proved a conspicuous failure, inasmuch as it has
taken ten years of persistent efforts by its use to make a change in the
admistration. I would suggest that you amend the registry law by providing
that all qualified voters have their ears punched, immediately after
voting, by the inspectors of elections, the same as conductors punch
tickets. This method will obviate the difficulties heretofore experienced,
and check illegal voting and prevent repeating.

ABOUT HELL.
An item is going the rounds of the papers, to illustrate how large the sun
is, and how hot it is, which asserts that if an icicle a million miles
long, and a hundred thousand miles through, should be thrust into one of
the burning cavities of the sun, it would be melted in the hundredth part
of a second, and that it would not cause as much "sissing" as a drop of
water on a hot griddle.


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