HIS PA GETS MAD!
"I was down to the drug store this morning and saw your Ma buying a lot of
court-plaster, enough to make a shirt I should think. What's she doing
with so much court-plaster?" asked the grocery man of the bad boy, as he
came in and pulled off his boots by the stove and emptied out a lot of
snow that had collected as he walked through a drift, which melted and
made a bad smell.
"O, I guess she was going to patch Pa up so he will hold water. Pa's
temper got him into the worst muss you ever see, last night. If that
museum was here now they would hire Pa and exhibit him as the tattooed
man. I tell you, I have got too old to be mauled as though I was a kid,
and any man who attacks me from this out, wants to have his peace made
with the insurance companies, and know that his calling and election is
sure, because I am a bad man and don't you forget it." And the boy pulled
on his boots and looked so cross and desperate that the grocer-man asked
him if he wouldn't try a little new cider.
"Good heavens!" said the grocery man, as the boy swallowed the cider, and
his face resumed its natural look, and the piratical frown disappeared
with the cider. "You have not stabbed your father have you? I have feared
that one thing would bring on another, with you, and that you would yet be
hung.
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