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Peck, George W., 1840-1916

"Peck's Compendium of Fun"


When a poor girl, who has gone creeping to her work at daylight, looks out
of the window at noon to see her master's carriage go by, in which there
is a five hundred dollar dog with a hundred dollar blanket on, and a
collar set with diamonds, lolling on satin cushions, and the girl is fined
ten cents for looking out of, the window, you don't want to fool
away any time trying to get us to go to a heaven where such heartless
employers are expected.
It is seldom the _Sun_ gets on its ear, but it can say with great
fervency, "Damn a man that will work poor girls like slaves, and pay them
next to nothing, and spend ten thousand dollars to catch a dog-thief!" If
these sentiments are sinful, and for expressing them we are a candidate
for fire and brimstone, it is all right, and the devil can stoke up and
make up our bunk when he hears that we are on the through train.
It seems now--though we may change our mind the first day at the fire--as
though we had rather be in hades with a hundred million people who have
always done the square thing, than to be in any heaven that will pass a
man in who has starved the poor and paid ten thousand dollars to catch a
dog-thief. We could have a confounded sight better time, even if we had
our ulster all burned off. It would be worth the price of admission to
stand with our back to the fire, and as we began to smell woolen burning
near the pistol pocket, to make up faces at the ten-thousand-dollar-dog
millionaires that were putting on style at the other place.


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