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Peck, George W., 1840-1916

"Peck's Compendium of Fun"

One is lying in a
hammock, with her feet on the window, reading the Chicago _Times_ article
on Oleomargarine, or Bull Butter, at intervals stopping the reading to
curse the writer, who claims that oleomargarine is an unlawful
preparation, containing deleterious substances.
A party of four oxen are seated around a table playing seven-up for the
drinks, and as the attendant steer passes along, a speckled ox with one
horn broken, orders four pails full of Waukesha water with a dash of
oatmeal in it, "and make it hot," says the ox, as he counts up high, low,
jack and the game.
Passing the card players the visitor notices an upright piano,
and asks what that is for, and the attendant steer says they are all fond
of music, and asks if he would not like to near some of the cattle play.
He says he would, and the steer calls out a white cow who is sketching,
and asks her to warble a few notes. The cow seats herself on her haunches
on the piano stool, after saying she has such a cold she can't sing, and,
besides, has left her notes at home in the pasture. Turning over a few
leaves with her forward hoof, she finds something familiar, and proceeds
to walk on the piano keys with her forward feet and bellow, "Meet me in
the slaughter house when the due bill falls," or something of that kind,
when the visitor says he has got to go up to the stock yards and attend a
reception of Colorado cattle, and he lights out.


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