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Leacock, Stephen, 1869-1944

"Frenzied Fiction"

"
After which somebody else said:
"I wonder how many of these submarines Germany has,
anyway?"
And then we drifted back into the humbler kind of war
talk that we have been carrying on for three years.
But later, as we walked home together, Rapley said to me:
"That fellow threw a lot of light on things in Europe,
didn't he?"
And I answered:
"Yes."
What liars we all are!


IV. Personal Adventures in the Spirit World
I do not write what follows with the expectation of
convincing or converting anybody. We Spiritualists, or
Spiritists--we call ourselves both, or either--never ask
anybody to believe us. If they do, well and good. If not,
all right. Our attitude simply is that facts are facts.
There they are; believe them or not as you like. As I
said the other night, in conversation with Aristotle and
John Bunyan and George Washington and a few others, why
should anybody believe us? Aristotle, I recollect, said
that all that he wished was that everybody should know
how happy he was; and Washington said that for his part,
if people only knew how bright and beautiful it all was
where he was, they would willingly, indeed gladly, pay
the mere dollar--itself only a nominal fee--that it cost
to talk to him.


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