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Leacock, Stephen, 1869-1944

"Frenzied Fiction"

The most I've
done is to go out to the edges of the cave sometimes and
look out and see them, Outside Men and Women, in the
distance. But of course, in one way or another, we Cave-men
know all about them. And the thing we envy most in you
Outside Men is the way you treat your women! By gee! You
take no nonsense from them--you fellows are the real
primordial, primitive men. We've lost it somehow."
"Why, my dear fellow--" I began.
But the Cave-man, who had sat suddenly upright, interrupted.
"Quick! quick!" he said. "Hide that infernal mug! She's
coming. Don't you hear!"
As he spoke I caught the sound of a woman's voice somewhere
in the outer passages of the cave.
"Now, Willie," she was saying, speaking evidently to the
Cave-child, "you come right along back with me, and if
I ever catch you getting in such a mess as that again
I'll never take you anywhere, so there!"
Her voice had grown louder. She entered the cave as she
spoke--a big-boned woman in a suit of skins leading by
the hand a pathetic little mite in a rabbit-skin, with
blue eyes and a slobbered face.
But as I was sitting the Cave-woman evidently couldn't
see me; for she turned at once to speak to her husband,
unconscious of my presence.


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