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Leacock, Stephen, 1869-1944

"Frenzied Fiction"


"All conditions. Perhaps I can't explain it properly.
But I have the prospectus of it indoors if you'd like to
see it. We take up Society."
"And what do you do with it?"
"Analyse it," she said.
"But it must mean reading a tremendous lot of books."
"No," she answered. "We don't use books in this course.
It's all Laboratory Work."
"Now I _am_ mystified," I said. "What do you mean by
Laboratory Work?"
"Well," answered the girl student with a thoughtful look
upon her face, "you see, we are supposed to break society
up into its elements."
"In six weeks?"
"Some of the girls do it in six weeks. Some put in a
whole semester and take twelve weeks at it."
"So as to break up pretty thoroughly?" I said.
"Yes," she assented. "But most of the girls think six
weeks is enough."
"That ought to pulverize it pretty completely. But how
do you go at it?"
"Well," the girl said, "it's all done with Laboratory
Work. We take, for instance, department stores. I think
that is the first thing we do, we take up the department
store."
"And what do you do with it?"
"We study it as a Social Germ."
"Ah," I said, "as a Social Germ."
"Yes," said the girl, delighted to see that I was beginning
to understand, "as a Germ.


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