But she wanted it--wanted it terribly. If she were
not to be allowed to indulge her imagination, then must she, all the
more, love some one with fervour: the two things were interdependent.
She surveyed her world with an eye to this possible loving. There was
her governess, who had been with her for a year now, tearful, bony,
using Barbara as a means and never as an end. Barbara did not love
her--how could she? Moreover, there were other physical things: the
lean, shining marble of Miss Letts's long fingers, the dry thinness of
her hair, the way that the tip of her nose would be suddenly red, and
then, like a blown-out candle, dull white again. Fingers and noses are
not the only agents in the human affections, but they have most
certainly something to do with them. Moreover, Miss Letts was too busily
engaged with the survey of her relations, with now this gentleman, now
that, to pay much attention to Barbara. She dismissed her as "a queer
little thing." There were in Miss Letts's world "queer things" and
"things not queer." The division was patent to anybody.
Barbara's father and mother were also surveyed.
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